Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Randomize
