you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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