I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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