he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Randomize