please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm passing your future prison.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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