He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Randomize
