the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize