I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Randomize
