Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Randomize
