We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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