So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Randomize
