Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
