So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
There are leaves in my underwear?
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize
