all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Randomize
