I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize