Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
Randomize
