Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
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