i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
