I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize