Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
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