shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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