i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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