i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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