I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
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