my soul wont recognize me after tonight
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
