I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
This is my gift to your gina
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Randomize
