last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
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The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
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You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
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