i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Only a mothe r could love this liver
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
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