I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
Randomize
