My Higher Power is John Stamos
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize