do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Randomize
