K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
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