Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
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