Non-Jews are for practice
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
