And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
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