hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize