What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
Randomize
