Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
