Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
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