Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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