There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize