I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Randomize
