Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
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