I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize