It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
Randomize
