Tell her she can't have a vagina
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
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