my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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