Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize