If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
Randomize
