remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
How does it feel to date your dad?
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
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