So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
